This isn't NME... P A R T O N E

Every year in the pages of NME the writers relish their roles as apparent know-alls of the music scene and inform us of their 'cool' list, a romp through every nu-rave and indie act in the UK, and as dull as it is informative. So, to counter their ineffable coolness, here are some faces I propse for the alternate 'cool' list.

Fenriz and Nocturno, aka Gylve Nagell and Ted Skjellum of Darkthrone. Long time pioneers of punk rock black metal. Their contribution to music is astounding but mostly goes unrecognised in the main stream music press.

Attila Csihar: Not only is he a member of the highly influential Mayhem, and was vocalist on that album De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas, Csihar has recently joined the ranks of 'funeral doom' duo Sunn 0))) and lent his vocals chords to, arguably, their greatest acheivement yet in Monoliths and Dimensions.

John Zorn, part musical genius, part complete lunatic, all jazz odyssey.

Genesis P-Orridge (born Neil Megson), of Throbbing Gristle and Psychic Youth. A [wo]man who has lent their whole life to artistic endeavour. The day Genesis P isn't 'cool' is the day mankind is fucked.

MF Doom aka Viktor Vaughn aka King Geedorah etc. So upset with the way the rap 'game' had changed in his absense, from lyrical skills to dollar bills, Daniel Dumile took on the persona of a super villain in order to out brag his hip hop counterparts, who were more concerned with money, cars and diamonds.

Morton Feldman; an inspirational composer and musician whose works and compositions are essential to contemporary classical music.

Karlheinz Stockhausen: little should need to be said about such an innovator as Stockhausen. His work has influenced every contemporary minimal artist under the sun and will continue to do so for generations.